invader-zim42

Mohawked Individual Saves Nation's Economy Using Flaming Sneeze Power NEW YORK (AP) — Wall Street is reporting an unexpected boom today, with stock values of nearly every company on the Dow showing a drastic spike upward as the stock market came to a close Monday. Insiders and economic experts say that the cause of the sudden rise is a punk in Queens with the power to sneeze fire. Nathan Caulfield, a Clifton, New Jersey native sporting a spiked leather-clad jacket and a mohawk almost as tall as the head it sits on, says he was grabbing lunch with a friend when it happened. He was about to bite into a hot dog when he felt the sneeze coming on, and he didn't have enough time to turn his head away. The next thing he knew, his hot dog had an excellent char to it. As with all news in New York, talk of the flaming sneeze traveled fast, and in under an hour it reached the front steps of 11 Wall Street before it then quickly traveled inside. "It's the best news we could have hoped for,"